What is this voluminous vibration jarring me
from deep slumber; scratch the veneer
and raw terror is unleashed unnameable,
reminding me of self imposed limitations
in a universe hardly vast enough to contain
what is termed consciousness,
Is there a plan, save for cracking open whirling holographic
Pandora’s boxes in a galaxy conceived of peripheries,
and to what purpose?

Call it what you will, mathematicians grasping, grasping
in the dusky corners of dawn, awakening minds amassing
formulae in a futile attempt to order what is glimpsed behind
the looking glass, smaller, larger, fractional, incalculable,
squinting at the shards of infinitude tapping tired neurons
on fringes of an exhausted awareness, quicksilver concepts
that vanish with indomitable proximity;

Beyond the confines of socially imposed self recrimination
and edifices of faith meant to ensure order if not perpetuation
of gods we humans can conceive of, lies, like the infant saint
in his cradle, the awakening of a species rolled
onto the playing field to face down mammoth or persona
with or without props in moments geared to cope
with overwhelming ideosynchracies or a plethora of possibilities;

Are we weak, are we brave, stick figures measuring up or staring down
a jabberwocky of cobbled illusion, mindless distraction
of one hundred years of limitation, detritus heaping up
around our ears and why, why exist at all with this yoke
around our jugular, believing it is a lifeline or a weight belt dragging us
under the waters of a cognizance meant to contravene itself
through daily rituals comprising the bulk of this blink in eternity, ensuring
not too much slack in our own short leashes,
hounds of hell or angels, in turn;

There is more, go beyond, walk out at daybreak to dwell
on the horizon! Beyond this day and tomorrow lies infinity,
itself conceptual, yet enough invitation to open like the sky
when all else in a world whose orbit is proscribed
by gravity weighs us down.


2015-07-18 18.06.34


21 thoughts on “Boundless

  1. Lots contained within your thoughts of these verses Bela.. I often wonder at what games those ‘Gods’ in whose image we were seeded had planned.. to what games they would have us play!.. There is far far more would we walk out and open our eyes and then go within and find the truth of the lies we were bred with.. Oh so much more..

    Loved reading your boundless thoughts Bela.. Happy Holidays and wishing you a Blessed Peaceful New Year

    Love Sue ❤

  2. Too much! Too much, dearest Bela! How can I, a mere ‘blink in eternity’, hope to conceive of such questions, let alone even begin to answer them? That said, I tend to eschew teleological concepts of existence, and feel no need for them within the narrow confines of my own, dryly prosaic, thought-streams, fascinating though religion and science can be. What I know is that the universe is becoming aware of itself, both on and about this tiny orb and, one suspects, upon and about many others too. My little ape mind cannot grasp why this may be so, yet what answer could possibly satisfy it I wonder? The awareness is its own end one might think, consisting as it is in innumerable blinks within what is perhaps a timeless eternity. Let us come down to less fanciful speculations in wishing you and yours immeasurable contentedness, and deep gratitude to you for all your visionary blinks shared during the past year. Aloha Bela! H ❤

    1. Haha, Hariod, you do make me smile. “Dryly prosaic,” indeed. I visited a good friend yesterday for conversation and a roaring if small fire in her lovely stone fireplace (you don’t see many of those in Hawaii, but she lives at a higher, wetter, cooler elevation). She is my cosmic sister, and our discussion ran to, among other things, the very subject of existence, ours among other life forms, as ‘god’ evolving; ‘god’ becoming more aware of itself, expanding itself as we, ourselves discover, explore, choose. And so I guess in many ways, I am an adventurer, an explorer, ever seeking the boundaries, always asking the questions. I can hardly help myself. And in this stretching and popping through various cocoons of my own experience, I am merely playing a part as the sensate creature I am. As my friend remarked, whatever we are learning here did not exist for us to learn elsewhere, and it rings true. Some of it seems so senseless, yet how to marvel at the texture and beauty of the pearl without enduring the struggle of breaking open that gnarly oyster; how to surf the crescendos of joy without having known the depths of despair? And so on we go … and on. In this world and beyond, as our part, if we have ‘one’ to speak of, in this stream of consciousness that creates, awakens into being, destroys, whatever – some perceiving primarily through the mind, some the emotions, some through the cosmic thrum of intuition. Although we might differ in that primary mode of reception, we learn from one another if we are lucky 🙂

      What a blessing to have ‘known’ you, wisdom being, this past year. Many blessings in 2016! And wishing you likewise a spacious contentedness. Aloha and Namaste, Hariod. ❤ Bela

  3. Dear Bela, I so envy all the questions you seem able to throw out at the universe, while I can only ask why. It surely makes a statement about the level of maturity of our individual capacities to fathom the unfathomable.

    1. Aloha, Jean! Yes, fathoming the unfathomable, though perhaps a fool’s errand, has always been my tendency. I love the cosmos and its seeming desire to convey its secrets, if we are but attentive. ❤

  4. Am I reading Boundless for the first time? Or is it a case of needing to look at it again as if for the first time? “Self-imposed limits” Don’t I remember that one, or have I been playing that game all my life? Perhaps I began so long ago, for fear of social consequences. Now, looking back, there were no possibly more negative social consequences than those self-inflicted to retain relationships that proved less worthy of the price than I could ever have imagined.
    Do you remember, since you mention “the looking glass” The House of Mirrors that we used to pay to walk through at carnivals? Maybe it’s been long discontinued to protect us (or at least children) from our own distortions. Would we recognize our innermost personality if it was presented to us in line-up and we had to choose which one we most recognized and felt comfortable with (perhaps an option).
    Thank you so much for offering thoughts of value in a world so very much in need of just that.

    1. Jean, you are a most interesting woman. I love your observations, thanks for sharing them. This : …”there were no possibly more negative social consequences than those self-inflicted to retain relationships that proved less worthy of the price than I could ever have imagined.” Oh, my. Nail on the head. We become who we are because of where we’ve been. And we’ve all been blind to what’s obvious now, at least those of us whose eyes are open. Bless you, and thanks for your kind words. ❤

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