Knowing God

She must have felt wicked
at an early age; sin seeding flesh
and flesh breeding sin for as long
as she could remember;

Was it the Church or the palpable shudder
of being assaulted at any moment
which engendered fear of Father
God betrayal around every curve
of cursed flesh, bane of she who strode lithely
through lush gardens, first of Eden,
bête primordial, cleanly cunning;

At the same time jammed into juxtaposition,
fire and grace sensed in nature as in cells,
could she own it, part and parcel,
in a form both exalted and condemned,
settling feet instead in streambeds,
seeking texture over flat, sensing oneness
with Creation, surely this and nothing Other
was her answer;

Still, awakened first in silence, sound waves stifled,
mind awash in quaking foliage, crests and swells
yet seeking ground in less deserving;
nonetheless arriving at considerable cost
to the core of Eve’s apple, tasting first
the sweetness, apprehensive, nothing lasting,
so bit firmly, stopping short of bitter center,
then was savored, fully through.



7 thoughts on “Knowing God

    1. Mahalo, Lorrie. This no doubt is a difficult poem for some, I realize. It is, however, key to how I arrived in the present moment. All the workshops on mindfulness could never have gotten me to that place quite as well 😉 Take good care, dear one, and enjoy the upcoming weekend! We are headed out to the other side of the island to bicycle to the lava flow 🙂 Should be amazing! And, I am sure, inspirational 😉 Aloha.

  1. “she who strode lithely through lush gardens, first of Eden, bête primordial, cleanly cunning” – marvellously powerful imagery here, Bela; I can see her there in her locus amoenus, her arcadia. Interesting how you’ve broken the two words ‘Father’ and ‘God’, which suggests two meanings. [No need to comment on that.] H ❤

    1. Oh, why doesn’t this surprise me? I think you reside in part of my psyche or something – you always do hone in on what I, myself am happiest to reveal in my writing. Thank you from the bottom of my soul for reading to comprehend! It’s such an honor.

      Yes, you’ve got it on both the visualization (helped, I hope, by the photo of our Maine land I ‘grew up’ on, though I would have preferred the shot – taken by my husband, I wasn’t there – be taken further east in the most amazing patch of pine and moss, but I digress …) … And the line break, purposefully placed, just so. Because. Many, many thanks to you, dear one, and hoping this finds you completely well! Aloha ❤


    Some tribe’s cobwebby myths
    Commandeered and tossed in
    With reworked patriotic tales
    Deep-fried into a new religion


    Cast in stone aids elites control
    Of all too scary unruly masses
    Alongside brute force of arms
    Slavery, theft and massacre


    So long divorced from love
    And fearful of the fear of fear
    Yet used fear and use it yet
    Bolstering a baleful status quo

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