Call It Moving On

She’s been dead a couple of years,
my soul mate. Lots of people’s soul mate.
That was her gift. She belonged to everybody
and nobody at all. She was very much
her own woman or the Goddess’ woman
or at least a powerful woman; no less
nor more than I, myself; but still.

We are stratified into more subtle layers
than most people care to discover,
a bit of fairy dust really, and yet.
It matters less and less only we did
understand one another, and upon death,
suddenly our work comes more alive.
People are searching for answers.
Our passing reminds them of this.

I keep wondering if I ought to be shaking
bits of her out of my body, but where
then do I put the pieces? I who am
daily reminded of footprints and planets,
the excesses of my own species. And still
I am reluctant to see those remnants go.

It’s not that I cannot let her progress,
she is doing that splendidly, even now;
and images come alive in heartbeats
out in the garden by the clove tree
which could never cast those memories
into fires of forgetfulness, knowing deep
as sap the need for proliferation of kindred,
her now-forgotten mace and nutmeg.

47 thoughts on “Call It Moving On

  1. This was a beautiful read Bela.
    Knowing as we do, we are so much more.. Knowing that we are not just ourselves, but part of all.. Your soul mate friend, can never be unpicked from your existence, even though the pain of losing her now diminishes with the balm she would wish to spread over you.
    Those ‘bits’ are part of each of your Earth Story that were meant to be weaved together..
    And I am sure her garden visits will continue to spread her peace..

    Love and Blessings dear Bela.. Sending you Joy and Harmony for a Happy, Healthy and Peaceful New Year my friend.. May you continue upon your own magical journey of discovery, for if you are like me.. I am always finding bits of me embedded in others.. 🙂

    Love and Hugs..
    Sue ❤ ❤ ❤

    1. Yes, Sue – and how could it be otherwise? We are all part of the One, yet the embodiments we witness on Planet Earth are so unique, it’s hard to let that outpicturing of the One go. Such a variety of creative expressions, some ‘just right’ for others. Such was my friend. And I am lucky too, in that I have two other friends who, though not ‘like her’ are ‘like me’ enough that I am blessed to treasure them through the decades – though they are not geographically near to me at all. Sigh. Life! And you are right about the bits being part of The Story, of course.

      Sending love and blessings right back to you, dear Sue – 2018 will be an Earth Dog year, unlike the 2 fire and 2 metal years that preceded it. Perhaps we’ll feel a bit more in our bodies, or that is my hope, as that Chinese calendar turns over in early February. Peace, dear one. ❤

      1. Yes! We only lose about 45 minutes in Hawaii ; nothing changes too much with the advent of winter in the way of light. The ocean becomes wilder and the winds and rains can lash us, but it’s a welcome respite from the hot and dry summer and fall. Be well, Betty – many happy returns in the New Year! ❤

      2. Betty, it’s not really endless summer – the seasons are simply more muted. And it depends on elevation here – 3500′ and above is freeeezing – enough to top Mauna Loa and Mauna Kea in snow most years. Here at 300′ elevation, it’s still cold at night, especially when it rains. Of course we’re talking mid to low 60’s at worst, generally. But to our blood, it’s cold. We have a wool blanket and quilt on our flannel-sheeted bed! Funny how one forgets bitter cold. And you can tell those of us who live here from the tourists, because we’re all walking around in long sleeves, sweaters and hats – but it’s often with flip-flops on our feet 😉 Some habits die hard. Aloha, and best wishes in 2018! ❤

      3. So hard to imagine that 60° temps would require flannel sheets and wool blankets at night! That’d be a summer night here requiring the A/C. Interesting how our bodies adapt to different climates.
        Hope you’re having a good New Year so far, Bela! 💕

      4. Haha, yes, but they do! And yes, it always amazes me how quickly our bodies adapt to climate and circumstance. It’s why humans are such a dominant species on the planet – we are resilient and adaptable to almost anything. (Yikes! 😉 )

        2018 is an Eleven year in numerology, my birth number, as it turns out. I have great hopes for this year. Blessings, Betty ❤

      5. Yikes is right!
        Contrary to logic, I too have a good feeling for 2018. Maybe it’s the Eleven thing – or maybe it just seems the pendulum is due to start swinging the other way. Either way I hope our intuition is right!
        Blessings back to you, Bela. 💕

  2. Hi Bela,

    Got the opportunity to visit you after quite a while.

    As I read your post, a feeling of Deja vu’ seemed to be peeping in, into my consciousness. And I was left wondering for a while why was that. Could it be that as I read your lines, a shared past seemed to show up? And what was this shared past? Could a past get connected and intertwined through reading each others’ posts? As we move away… and then come back?

    “People are searching for answers.
    Our passing reminds them of this.”

    Regards

    Shakti

    1. Shakti, how lovely to hear from you, once again. I am certain those of us who feel a connection in this life no doubt share a past, but yes, what is that? And what of the future beyond this life?

      If it is true that we are all part of the One, then it would stand to reason that atoms vibrating at like frequencies collect together like cells in a petri dish. So perhaps we share a dish somewhere 😉

      At any rate, wishing you the very best at the turn of the New Year, dear one, and hoping to hear more from you in 2018. 2017 has been a bit of a wild ride on this side of the pond! Aloha ❤

      1. Happy New Year 2018! It’s hard to deal with these feelings of loss, but I feel though you can’t see her, your friend is right there by your side. Hugs back dear Bela.❤

  3. you have magically captured great fragments of true soul love here, bela. really, really moving and universally resonant – in turn, a universal proof that there is so much more to us than our ‘meat suits’.
    may 2018 be a year of peace and channeled growth for you and your loved ones. i see your hands taking some reins and i just know you’ll know what to do.
    thank you for your consistent commentary and support in this big ol’ blog world – it means a lot! xxoo

    1. Thank you so much, weaver! I appreciate that this resonated with you on all the levels it was meant to for anyone 😉

      I do have great hopes that 2018 will bring more optimistic changes (as all of life is change) for everyone concerned. I hope this for you as well! And I am happy to support you in and out of the blogosphere. Your name comes up in circles that know it more than anyone else we’ve all never met, if that makes sense! 😀 I so appreciate your wisdom and astrological guidance, as do these other people. Peace, love, and may your dreams materialize in this brand New Year! ❤

      1. aw, shucks, bela…i can make enough sense of that. 😉 i am genuinely grateful – and since we are all in this together, we can ALL increase in support and materialization! thank you. in particular. for being a steady wellspring of encouragement while i was ‘out to sea’ xoxo

      2. When you say ‘out to sea’ I think of the old poem, The Owl and the Pussycat (… went to sea, in a beautiful pea-green boat…they took some honey and plenty of money wrapped up in a five-pound note …). So I’ll think of your pea-green boat slapping gently at the shoreline, awaiting its launch once again 😉 Aloha, w. ❤

      3. i love the idea of you thinking of the boat at the shoreline but i really don’t want to go ‘out’ if i dont have to! very little in the physical world gets accomplished. i certainly better get my mental house in order, though, as this yin/yang force was actually just giving me a taste of a very long stretch of upcoming journey. must find my ‘honey and money’, mustn’t i? 😉

      4. Haha, I’m just the opposite. I’d go out to sea anytime and damn the consequences! But I suspect we are at very different stages of our lives, dear weaver.

        Speaking of honey and money, I do remember the exquisite Greek honey I had atop my yogurt while on Skyros all those years ago. I believe I gained 10 lbs. in less than a month because I simply could not get enough of it. SO good. And then again, it might have also been all that Retsina 😉 xoxoxo

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