Too Soon Gone

Where on earth do I belong?
I have taken up space on this orb
for nearly seventy years, many
of these spent in utter confusion,
lost to myself, leaving many
others to wonder, who is this being?
As if I, myself held the answers,
aware of my motivations, I did not;

And I get it, perhaps I am not solitary
in these musings, perhaps it is a product
of age and experience, duration
in a life spent with memories,
reflections, condensation of thirty-
five years of living in the Maine woods,
a home my heart returns to endlessly,
though those days are gone forever;

Even if I could return, I would not,
desecrated forests, polluted waters
where once I swam and floated
without human observation,
contemplating the brilliance
of streaming light from heavenly bodies
not yet emerging into view, swimming
with loons, their young paddling
behind parents, my future not something
I contemplated, rather encountered
often haltingly, day by day, headlong
and too often blindly as if rushing
into blackness, life happening to me,
instead of crafting it, shaping it
into a thing of my own choosing;

And now I sit, watching clouds gather,
listening to birds and the distant thump
of a garbage truck going about its run,
collecting refuse we cannot use,
all the detritus left as a product
of living in the twenty-first century,
too many people, how has it come
to this where, despite wilderness
surrounding me, my thoughts drift
constantly to the unnecessary waste,
not only refuse, but resentments, pain
of those growing up, not knowing years
in human form are precious and short,
building castle walls of separation,
unforgiveness, and it will be gone without warning to all of us, in the blinking eyes left to observe what once seemed an endless, open, uncluttered road of possibilities.

High desert sky, northern New Mexico, 2022 ~ bj

10 thoughts on “Too Soon Gone

  1. I love this Bela. πŸ™πŸΌπŸ’πŸ’• Sweet memories bring our sense of loss to the fore. So much is behind us now. Yet happiness is always present when we pause to welcome it.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes, and sterling points you make, Val. This poem wanted to be written, and it ended how it did. But happiness needs to be a focal point, now more than ever. Thanks for clarifying that. πŸ™πŸ’“

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow what a sky Bela.. and what wonderful crafted thoughts you turn into words Bela..
    Argh where indeed does time fly to.. And yes the years all too soon roll by as we watch the changing landscape…
    Change is something we cannot stop.. HOW we change it, it up to us…. Let us hope we have instilled a legacy into our children’s children to take better care and to respect our Earth Mother than many within our generation have done..

    Sending love and hugs my friend ❀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You must’ve felt a psychic tug from me lately. In between visitors and gardening and such, I’ve been meaning to write you an email and will do so soon. Thank you as always for your reading and wise responses. I’ll find out how everything else is going privately. πŸ˜‰πŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ’•

      Liked by 1 person

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